Book Reviews - The Relationship Educator

Viewing Relationship Education through the Lens of Social Poverty

By Alan J. Hawkins

The Bottom-line First. I have waited anxiously for Sarah Halpern-Meekin’s new book, Social Poverty, since I first heard her describe the study and writing project three years ago. I wasn’t disappointed. Her analysis of low-income parents’ lives and their experiences trying to strengthen their relationships for the sake of their children provides a clearer lens with which to view relationship education and federal policies to help low-income couples strengthen their relationships. Continue reading “Viewing Relationship Education through the Lens of Social Poverty”

When Less Is More:

Exploring the Implications of Eli Finkel’s “All-or-Nothing Marriage” for Marriage and Relationship Education

by Alan J. Hawkins

The Bottom-line First: In Finkel’s recent book, The All-or-Nothing Marriage, he argues that marriage has been subsumed within the current zeitgeist of individualism. This new orientation creates a more fragile basis for life-long marriage and is a major force behind family instability rates. Despite the challenges and risks, he argues that contemporary marriage is primed for people to find the most satisfying relationships that married couples have ever been able to enjoy. Today we expect peak, summit marriages with exhilarating vistas that regularly inspire us. Finkel devotes much of the book to strategies to help couples achieve these high-altitude marriages. But, importantly, he also explores how to cope when we can’t reach the summit. His analysis has important implications for relationship education. Continue reading “When Less Is More:”

Book Review — Proposing Prosperity: Marriage Education Policy and Inequality in America

by Alan J. Hawkins

The Bottom-line First: While I value the contribution Jennifer Randles’ book makes to the field, I have some beefs with her analysis of federal policy efforts to promote relationship education. She argues that relationship education is the wrong approach because healthy relationships and marriages are a product of social and economic circumstances that provide a nurturing environment in which relationships can flourish. She asserts an economic threshold below which romantic relationship aspirations are essentially hopeless. Yes, we need to work to improve the social and economic ecology that nurtures romantic relationships, that makes it easier for love to thrive. But ultimately, her argument inadvertently minimizes the dignity of those she sincerely hopes to help. As she documents, participants in the program she studied in-depth overwhelmingly enjoyed and appreciated the program for the message of hope it delivered, despite their difficult circumstances. They valued the knowledge and skills that gave them a sense of agency to achieve their relationship aspirations, even knowing the obstacles ahead. Randles worries that hope is false and insensitive. I disagree. Continue reading “Book Review — Proposing Prosperity: Marriage Education Policy and Inequality in America”